Conceal, Don't feel
by shadowhunterakira
Summary: Elsa is struggling to deal with hundreds of thoughts running through her head, and Anna is there to help her through it, but is Elsa hiding her true feelings? (Elsanna) (icest) Don't like don't read. I suck at summaries. Rated T for language


**A/N:** Hellooo! I'm back! Sorry for he huge delay in writing anything in the form of FanFiction at all. I really have no excuse either. But here's a one-shot I wrote in school ;p

OH, just a note. Elsa's thoughts are in italics. You probably could've figured that out, but hey, just making sure.

I hope you enjoy xx

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing that belongs to Disney, yada-yada-yada, but if I owned Elsa, damn girl ;D

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Elsa smiled sadly as she gazed at the auburn head resting on her shoulder as she played with the white strand of hair. _How do you stand me after I nearly killed you?_ She sighed deeply. _Twice. _Anna shifted a little, tilting her face towards Elsa, still fast asleep. _I don't deserve you at all. How did I end up with someone as good as you, for someone as worthless as me?_ Elsa felt the prick of tears in her eyes, and Anna shivered, burrowing further into her side, making her notice the sharp decrease in temperature. _Conceal, don't feel. Conceal, don't feel! You can't hurt her again! _

Anna wrapped her arms tighter around Elsa's waist as her breath began to emit in white puffs. Elsa winced as her fingernails dug into her palms. _ConcealdontfeelConcealdontfeelconce-_

"Elsa?" Anna said quietly. Elsa jumped violently, startled by her sisters voice, pushing her away from her. "Elsa, what's wrong?"

_Conceal, don't feel!_

Anna reached for her sibling's hands that were now clasped tightly to her chest. Elsa flinched away from the touch, hot tears threatening to fall.

"Elsa, come on, don't push me away again, I've only got you back." The redhead whispered.

_I don't want to hurt you! That's all I'm good for._

"Anna… I can't be near you." Elsa muttered sadly, tears spilling down her cheeks.

_I'm a monster; all I do is hurt people._

"Oh, Elsa"

Elsa hung her head, tears landing on her lap. Anna shuffled across the sofa, and Elsa shifter uncomfortably.

_My heart tells me to stay, my head tells me to go._

Anna placed her hand on Elsa's arm, and felt the girl shudder at the simple touch, her muscles tensing.

"You aren't going anywhere." The younger girl said softly, reaching her hand up slowly to brush away a tear on her sisters' face.

"Anna please," Elsa cried quietly. "Don't touch me..."

Said girl sighed quietly. "Elsa, please stop beating yourself up about this. Nothing was your fault. I'm fine now, aren't I?"

"Yes Anna, but I hurt you in the first pl-"

"Elsa! You healed me too!"

Anna took her sisters face in her hands.

_Don't pull away, conceal, don't feel._

"Elsa, you need to learn that I'll love you no matter what you do, okay? I'm not going anywhere."

_Anna…_

The temperature was still dangerously low, and Anna was shivering. Her comforting not helping in the slightest.

"Anna, I'm nothing but trouble. You should be dead because of me. I caused all of this, it **is** my fault." Elsa protested, reaching her hand out to brush a strand of hair out of Anna's eyes. When she was about to retreat her hand, Anna caught her by the wrist, her palm facing her.

_NO!_

Elsa tried to rip her hand from her sisters' but her grasp was too strong.

"Anna what are you doing?!" she exclaimed, panic rising inside her.

"It's alright Elsa, I promise."

"Please let me go!" she said harshly. _Conceal, don't feel._

Anna shifted her grip on Elsa's hand, so her thumbs were holding Elsa's palm in place, but holding her fingers out at the same time.

_You can't hurt her again! Conceal, don't feel!_

Anna lowered her head to Elsa's hand.

_Concealdontfeelconcealdontfeel!_

Anna pressed her lips to Elsa's palm. Completely unaware of what was happening; she had to suppress a moan as her eyes fluttered closed. Anna smiled against her sisters' hand as the temperature in the room started to rise again. Her guard dropped and Anna seized the moment to grab Elsa around the waist and pull her close.

"See, you didn't hurt me." Anna whispered, her breath tickling Elsa's neck.

_What just happened?_

Anna was now pressed tightly against Elsa, who was still in momentary shock from the experience. Holding the girl in a tight embrace, she pulled the older girl into her lap.

"I love you Elsa"

_Anna… I love you too, but not in the same way you think._

"I-I love you too, Anna,"

_You're disgusting._

"I'm so sorry,"

_Stop talking to her._

"I don't know how you could forgive me after what I did…"

_You're a freak, a monster_

"Elsa, it's all right, I promise."

_She's too good for you._

"Anna," Elsa said standing up, "I need to go."

_You fucking coward, just run from your problems instead of facing them. You'll never deserve her. Not any piece of her._

"No, Elsa, come ba-" Anna began to protest, but her sister was already gone.

Elsa closed her bedroom door, locking it on the way in. She just made it to the bed before she started to cry. Tears streamed down her face and her breath hitched in her chest.

"Anna I love you. I love you so much."

_You disgusting creature, how are you even on this earth? If only your parents could see you know. They would be disgraced. How dare you defile their memory like that?_

Elsa buried her head in the pillow, sobbing openly now, coughing and curling in on herself. Frost spread quickly across the carpet and began to ascend the walls.

_What have I done? I've given her false hope in our relationship as__** sisters**__, nothing more than sisters, not that anything more could happen between us. She'd be disgusted if she knew this was how I felt. Oh, I'm such a fool. I can't be free. She's not safe with me. _

Ice was now forming on the window as Elsa squeezed her eyes shut. Images of Anna flashed in her brain. Her peaceful look when asleep, the adorable freckles scattered across the bridge of her nose and down her shoulders. The strand of hair that fell in front of her eyes when she got excited. The cute blush that always formed on her beautiful cheekbones when she thought she was rambling, her smile, her perfectly straight white teeth, and her gorgeous pink lips.

_Stop it! You can't think like that! She's your sister! This is your entire fault, do you understand? If you hadn't have made such a scene of her pulling your glove off, none of this would've happened. You would still be alone, and she would still be safe. So do yourself a favour and stay away from her, don't hurt her any more than you already have._

By this point there were now icicles forming on the ceiling. Elsa cried harder, her tears soaking her pillow. She was hiccupping, trying to catch a breath, and nearly didn't hear the knock on her bedroom door.

"Elsa? I know you're in there."

"Anna, please, leave me be."

"No, Elsa, whatever you're going through, we can go through together."

_If only you knew Anna._

"Right, well, if you aren't going to let me in, I'll just come in myself." She said, matter-of-factly. Elsa watched as the door handle was tried and then buried her head back into the pillow. She jerked her head back up from its resting place as she heard the sound of metal on metal, then a loud 'click'. Elsa stared in wonder, and fear as her handle was tried again, and her door opened.

_You traitor_

Anna entered cautiously then gasped as she looked at the room around her. Large icicles hung from the ceiling, frost covered the ground, the window was straining in the cold, and there was a large flurry of snow in the middle of the room over Elsa's bed, where her sister had curled in a ball and buried her head in a mound of pillows.

"Elsa! What the hell happened between the sofa and here?" Anna asked incredulously.

_What didn't happen would be the proper question._

Anna slowly slid her way over to the edge of the bed, sitting down beside her sister and placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Was it something I did?" Anna asked quietly.

_Don't blame yourself, Anna_

"No, it wasn't you." The blonde girl replied, her voice muffled by the pillows.

"Then please tell me Elsa so I can help you."

_You wouldn't want to help me if I did tell you._

"Please let me in."

_Oh, Anna. Always so selfless._

"I feel like I have you back, but not all of you."

_You're hurting her again, great job, pat yourself on the back you worthless piece of shit._

Elsa refused to reply, but stayed with her head buried in her pile of pillows.

"Oh, for gods sake Elsa!" Anna said, standing up and throwing her hands in the air. "Sometimes I wonder why I even bother."

_Now she actually does hate you. Way to go._

Elsa burst into a fresh set of tears, and the snow above her bed started to get heavier.

_She's going to leave, do something at least._

"Aw, no,nonononono. Elsa, I didn't mean it like that." Anna said, instantly regretting her little outburst. She sat back down on the bed.

Elsa rolled over and looked at her sister.

"I'm sorry for acting like this." She sniffed

_There, not so hard, was it?_

Anna smiled. "It's alright, I just wish you would tell me what's wrong."

Elsa sat up and scooted towards her sister.

"I can't, it's complicated."

"I'm sure I could figure it out"

"It's a long story."

"I have plenty of time."

Elsa sighed and Anna looked at her expectantly, her head tilted ever so slightly to one side, her teal eyes bright. She looked gorgeous. The strand of hair had escaped from its braid on the left hand side and fell across her face.

Her heart groaned as she remembered the kiss on her palm, clasping her hands together.

_You aren't seriously considering this, are you? You can't tell her! You'll lose the only family you have left._

"You gonna tell me?" Anna asked, breaking the silence between them.

"You don't have to right now if it makes you too uncomfortable." She reassured, breaching the gap between them and taking Elsa's hands in her own for the second time that day. Elsa's heart pounded in her chest as she scanned her younger sisters' face.

_You can't. Don't you dare, you'll ruin everything! _

"I love you, Anna."

The redhead looked at her in confusion.

"I love you too Elsa but what has that got to do with-"

Anna was silenced as Elsa closed the distance between them and crashed their lips together. It lasted all of a few second before Elsa pulled away, hanging her head, bracing herself for the onslaught of remarks to come.

_You've done it now, idiot._

Anna's mind was whirling and all she could form in reply was a simple; "Oh."

She wasn't sure what she was feeling right now, but it was mainly shock at the fact that her sister kissed her. She brought her fingers to her lips. Her sister had kissed her. Her _sister_ had kissed her. Anna thought she was about to explode. Elsa felt the same way! Anna had been dropping hints, but jeez was Elsa slow to pick them up. The kiss on the hand was by far the most obvious, but Elsa still didn't notice.

Elsa sat in fear, her eyes downcast, so she didn't notice Anna's face split into a smile before the shorter girl moved forward, seizing her by the chin and capturing her lips. Elsa's eyes widened in surprise, but then realised what was happening and reciprocated the motion. Feeling a surge of confidence, she nipped at Anna's lower lip, asking for entrance which was quickly and eagerly granted. Elsa's tongue roamed Anna's mouth as she dominated the kiss.

_She tastes like chocolate…_

Elsa hummed and continued to deepen the kiss, grasping tightly at Anna's hips, pulling her closer as Anna had a hand firmly at the base of Elsa's neck, the other resting on the taller girls' toned stomach. They finally broke apart, lungs burning for oxygen and rested their foreheads together, Anna now in Elsa's lap. The redhead smiled at her sister, tangling her hands in the pale blond locks. Elsa smiled back, placing a light kiss on the end of the younger girls' nose.

"I love you Elsa."

"I love you too, Anna."

And this time it was said in the way that mattered the most.

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**A/N: **So, I hope you enjoyed, don't forget to review, fav and/or follow. Its always much appreciated, as is _constructive _criticism. Have a nice weekend guys!

Peace out

~Akira


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